When You Teach A Politician How To Steal From You, This Is What Happens

Finally, the event with the Governor was over. The Commissioner and his friend a Minister of the Federal Republic of Nigeria, sat together at the Lodge drinking, a file on the table. The discussion has been going on for a while since the Civil Servant brought the files in. Both politicians listened with rapt attention.

The Civil Servant said, “Oga let me show you how to do it...”

“Really? Would this work?”

“Nobody will even know how you did it. All monies will be accounted for Sir.”

The Commissioner and Minister stole a glance at each other and smiled. They never knew it was so easy to cook the books and skim so much off the top.

“But how do you know this?” asked the minister.

“You see that Dome over there, where you both attended the Governor’s unveiling, Sir?”

“Yes. What about it?”

“It cost the government N3.6 billion on paper. But the actual cost for it was 90 times below that!”

“You don’t say?” eyes popped out into shinning globes.

“Yes Sir, it is true.”

“You see, that Publisher did not bring original new materials from overseas. Rather this was his old dome situated along the Maroco axis road, which the Lagos State Government asked him to remove because it was in the right of way of the new road expansion being carried out by the Governor of Lagos state. So the Publisher simply dismantled it, brought it down here and it was simply re-coupled here. Even now as we speak, you saw how some parts of the roof has already begun leaking. These materials are not meant for temperate regions such as ours.”

“Wow! I used to hear whiffs about this, but this is really up-close and personal.”

“Sir, let me tell you, as a matter of fact did you know that every month N1 million was set aside for it’s maintenance? Yet the reality on ground is that no maintenance of any sort is being done per say. Even though the money now has been reviewed down to N750,000. Money exchange hands, but no work is done. 

“Sir, sir, you see. At the beginning just when the dome was inaugurated, N22 million was set aside yearly for its maintenance. But only N17 million was shown to be approved. By the time it got to our knowledge, the money has reduced to N12 million on paper. And when it finally reached the Oga who did the disbursing, well you won’t believe how far the money simply dwindled.”

The Commissioner and Minister wore soured looks on their faces; their minds doing mathematical summersaults. 

The Civil Servant felt he had them exactly where he wanted them. They were hooked! So he plunged on, “Awhile back, Sir,” he said, “N17 million was approved for rain boots, umbrellas etc. in this ministry for staff. As we speak only a few umbrellas, rain boots and a dozen chairs were bought! But where’s the money? The former director who is now a speaker and one key director still in the ministry, were the ones in cahoots and today they have buildings and landed properties all over the town. Even ordinary S.As knows how this works. The one currently under my Oga at the top already has 3 cars in less than 9 months!”

“You mean a Special Adviser acquired all that within so short a time? Wat is the world coming to.”

“Oga, that’s how it works oo. It is where you work you eat from.”

“So you’re saying if we cook the books here... into the budget, it means we can get as much N5,000,000 just like many directors gets in less than a month or year?”

“Absolutely Sir! Sir, even at my level Sir, let me show you how it is done. Say for example my office Oga asked me to put up a billboard, and the sum approved for it was N500, 000; all I spend is N40,000 for the job. Once that is set aside, I give you as my Commissioner N150,000; N120,000 to my other boss and the balance left is for me to do with as I pleased. But the signboard will be there for all to see, despite that it is cheaper than the quality approved for.”

“Alright. That makes it crystal clear, doesn’t it?” teased the commissioner before he signed the budget. The deal has been struck.

But when the money was approved, the Civil Servant did not know it. What gave away his political boss was the new ride and land he suddenly bought and was building on it barely three months after their talk! And each time his boss saw him, he’ll instantly put his phone to his ear, indicating to him that he was busy.

After a few more trial, his boss began to wear a permanent scowl on his face each time he saw him. Matter of fact, it seemed his boss had told his secretary not to allow the Civil Servant access into his office!

The Civil Servant tried to weep but the tears would not come. He had shown his boss the way hoping he would have gotten a deal of the chunk but he had been sidelined, just like that!